What I Had For Thanksgiving Dinner/ VEGAN


Vegan Thanksgiving dinner I had and made for my parents. I hope you all had a great Thanksgiving!
Last years vegan Thanksgiving meal- https://youtu.be/7gsaq5QlJTc

6 comments

  1. Your delightful video has inspired me to tell a story of a Thanksgiving dinner in stark contrast to your lovely, festive spread. Sorry, it might be kinda long, but I can’t resist.

    An Evil, Carnist Thanksgiving
    A Short Story by
    Me

    Copyright not reserved. Anyone who reads this can do whatever they please with it.

    Thanksgiving dinner was, as always, two hours late. The Evil Carnist Stepmother had again, as always, misjudged how long it would take to thoroughly roast the body of the Wise and Beautiful Vegan Princess’s (that’s me. I’m also very modest.) poor dead friend. Though her father, the Kind and Gentle King, who would like a divorce, but can’t afford to be taken to the cleaners, doesn’t even like to eat turkey, the Evil Carnist In-laws kept shouting “Oh the herbs, the Herbs, THE HERBS!!!!!”, leaving the Evil Carnist Stepmother quite satisfied that she had chosen her victim well, and leaving the Wise and Beautiful Vegan Princess wondering, if it’s all about the herbs, why people can’t just add some sage and rosemary to a nice batch of mushroom gravy instead of rubbing them all over the skin of someone’s dead body before they shove them in the oven Hansel-and-Gretel-style.

    The baby carrots, which aren’t baby carrots at all, but really old, dried, cracked carrots that have been shaved on a lathe so companies can sell what would otherwise be thrown away, had been allowed to sit out in an uncovered strainer on the sunny kitchen windowsill for twenty four hours, then briefly warmed up in melted European cow butter. The standard canned green bean and French fried onion casserole made an appearance. There was going to be a dish of sauteed baby spinach, but the Evil Carnist Stepmother got too tired to cook it. The lettuce salad was dressed in blue cheese dressing, with chunks of blue cheese tossed in, also made from the milk of European cows. Nothing but the finest for the Evil Carnist In-laws!

    The Kind and Gentle King, who cries when he has to bury a dead mouse, feasted well upon store-bought croissants and green bean casserole (because everything else was inedible) while he waited for his favorite dish, scalloped potatoes.

    Now, prior to meeting the Evil Carnist Stepmother, the Wise and Beautiful Vegan Princess had never met a potato she didn’t like. In fact, she was of the firm belief that it is impossible to ruin a potato.

    Never fear. The Evil Carnist Stepmother had spent years inventing new and creative ways of destroying the worthy potato all in the guise of “gourmet cooking”. The King even sent her to the San Francisco Culinary Academy, ostensibly to learn knife skills, but really to become even more proficient at ruining potatoes.

    This Thanksgiving was no exception. The recipe selected was for potatoes au gratin, with shallots, leeks, and Gruyere cheese made in Europe from the milk of European cows. She was to leave the potatoes unpeeled, which was the main reason for the selection, since she was too tired to peel potatoes. Then she was to slice them very thinly, parboil them, and put them in a baking dish with the leeks and shallots, and lots of cow butter, cow milk, and the Gruyere, which smells like a dirty carnist butt crack.

    She baked them for half an hour at 350 degrees F, because the recipe in the gourmet magazine told her to, but they were still hard and crunchy. So she put them in for another half hour. Still hard and crunchy.

    “I think there is something wrong with these potatoes.” said she. (They were just ordinary russets from Trader Joe’s.)

    “Oh yes, there must be something wrong with the potatoes!” exclaimed the Evil Carnist Father In-law.

    “Of COURSE there is something wrong with the potatoes!” shouted the Evil Carnist Mother In-law (who is going deaf from animal wax plugging her ears and animal fat in her blood shutting down the circulation in her capillaries.) “I’ve had the SAME THING happen to ME!!!”

    “I KNOW! I’ll put them in the MICROWAVE!!!” shouted the Evil Carnist Step-mother (who is also going deaf from animal wax plugging her ears and animal fat in her blood shutting down the circulation in her capillaries.)

    It is not known for how long and at what power level the potatoes were nuked. They rest in the garage refrigerator now, after the King was forced to sample them before they could be served to the Evil Carnist In-laws. He declared them “inedible.”

    A fine store-bought pecan pie was indulged in by the Evil Carnist trio. An apple pie was purchased for the King, but had become extremely moldy. The Evil Carnist Stepmother would have scraped the mold off and served it to the Kind and Gentle King anyway, had not his daughter, the Wise and Beautiful Vegan Princess, told her “You can’t serve that. You need to leave it sealed and take it back to the store. And next time, check the sell-by date.”

    Meanwhile, the Princess enjoyed a seven course vegan meal, prepared from scratch with her own delicate, lily-white hands. Except for the Gardein turkey cutlet. And finished it off with a delightful homemade pumpkin swirl cheesecake. She might have shared the stuffing, potatoes, and corn pudding with the King. Indeed, she almost offered to saute the spinach. But she knew that should it ever be discovered that the Wise and Beautiful Vegan Princess is a better cook than the Evil Carnist Stepmother, there will be a rain of fire breathing toads, a plague of Lone Star ticks biting all the carnists in the world and making them allergic to meat, dogs and cats will start living together, and the Earth will crack in two.

    The next morning, the King noted that the microwave hadn’t cooked his oatmeal.
    “What?” said the Princess, “I just heated my water for my tea and it sounded fine.”
    “It’s not working though. My oatmeal is cold and not cooked.” said he.
    “Oh you’re right. This water is cold.” said she. “She must have burned it out trying to cook those damned potatoes.”

    Later that afternoon, the Evil Carnist Stepmother decided to heat some water for her own tea. After the seventh attempt to heat the water, she declared the microwave broken.

    “AHA!!!” shouted the Evil Carnist Trio, in unison, “THAT’S why the potatoes didn’t cook!!! The MICROWAVE was broken!!!”

    And the moral of the story is, if you are obese, have had angioplasty, stroke, and or breast cancer, you can have all the steak, salmon, bacon, eggs, cheese, butter, cream, sour cream, and half-and-half you want, but stay away from salted nuts. Those buggers’ll kill ya.

    All events and dialog are recorded herein as they happened. Only the names have been changed to protect the guilty.

    If you have read this far, I thank you, Gentle Reader. I REALLY needed to vent.

  2. they all look so incredible ,I just started watching ur videos like from a week ,in a week I saw everyone of ur video mam thanku so much for the recipes and ur love towards animals is just so inspiring

Leave a Reply